[8] I make the statement boldly, after long and careful
reflection, and severe self-examination.
As I said before, I did not entirely lose my external consciousness,
although it was very dim and dream-like. On returning to the natural
state, my recollection of what had occurred during the trance became
equally dim; but I retained a general impression of the character of the
possession. I knew that some foreign influence--the spirit of a dead
poet, or hero, or saint, I then believed--governed me for the time; that
I gave utterance to thoughts unfamiliar to my mind in its conscious
state; and that my own individuality was lost, or so disguised that I
could no longer recognize it. This very circumstance made the trance an
indulgence, a spiritual intoxication, no less fascinating than that of
the body, although accompanied by a similar reaction. Yet, behind all,
dimly evident to me, there was an element of terror. There were times
when, back of the influences which spoke with my voice, rose another,--a
vast, overwhelming, threatening power, the nature of which I could not
grasp, but which I knew was evil. Even when in my natural state,
listening to the harsh utterances of Miss Fetters or the lofty spiritual
philosophy of Mr.
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