"Holland is a low country, in fact
it is such a very low country that it is no wonder that it is dammed all
round."
The trials of mistresses on the home front are happily described in the
reply of a child to a small visitor who inquired after her mother. "Thank
you, poor mummie's a bit below herself this morning--what with the cook and
the Kaiser."
[Illustration:
POMPOUS LADY: "I shall descend at Knightsbridge."
TOMMY (aside): "Takes 'erself for a bloomin' Zeppelin!"]
We have to thank an ingenious correspondent for drawing up the following
"credibility index" for the guidance of perplexed newspaper readers:
London, Paris, or Petrograd (official) 100
" " " (semi-official) 50
Berlin (official) 25
It is believed in military circles here that-- 24
A correspondent that has just returned from the
firing-line tells me that-- 18
Our correspondent at Rome announces that-- 11
Berlin (unofficial) 10
I learn from a neutral merchant that-- 7
A story is current in Venice to the effect that-- 5
It is rumoured that-- 4
I have heard to-day from a reliable source that-- 3
I learn on unassailable authority that-- 2
It is rumoured in Rotterdam that-- 1
Wolff's Bureau states that-- 0
_January, 1915_.
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