I covered my eyes with my hands.
"Oh, I cannot, I cannot," I said; "anything but this! God be merciful;
let me go rather to some infinite place of torment where at least I may
feel myself alive. Do not ask this of me!"
Amroth made no answer, and I saw that he was regarding me fixedly,
himself pale to the lips; but with a touch of anger and even of
contempt, mixed with a world of compassion and love. There was something
in this look which seemed to entreat me mutely for my own sake and his
own to act. I do not know what the impulse was that came to
me--self-contempt, trust, curiosity, the yearning of love. I closed my
eyes, I took a faltering step, and stumbled, huddling and aghast, over
the edge. The air flew up past me with a sort of shriek; I opened my
eyes once, and saw the white cliffs speeding past. Then an
unconsciousness came over me and I knew no more.
XXXIII
I came to myself very gradually and dimly, with no recollection at first
of what had happened. I was lying on my back on some soft grassy place,
with the air blowing cool over me. I thought I saw Amroth bending over
me with a look of extraordinary happiness, and felt his arm about me;
but again I became unconscious, yet all the time with a blissfulness of
repose and joy, far beyond what I had experienced at my first waking on
the sunlit sea.
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