There
is a good furnished bungalow here, our other fellow travellers have gone
on to Murree, so we have the house to ourselves.
SEPTEMBER 12th.--To Murree, ten miles, road the same as yesterday. Went
to Woodcot, and found Spurgeon, Gordon, and Egerton, of the 36th; Hensma
and Beadnell, 77th; and Dalrymple, 88th. Put up with them sharing
Spurgeon's room. Spent a pleasant time at Murree, doing very little--a
long rest of ten days after my labours--and on the 22nd, at 1 o'clock, I
took my seat in the mail cart with Redan Massy for my companion, and
started on my journey to Peshawur. Arrived at Rawul Birder at 6 in the
evening, and went on at once by the Government van. Had no time for
food. Got to Peshawur at 7 o'clock next morning, and thus ended my three
months sick leave. And now I go back to the din and bustle of life, the
empty conventionalities of society, the noise and glitter of mess; to
the re-pursuit of my profession, and to learn again by the bedside of
many a dying man how weak and powerless is that profession to combat the
ills that flesh is heir to. I sometimes wish I could exchange my present
calling. Terrible thoughts often assail me, after the death of any of my
patients. Questions as to whether I am at all responsible for the fatal
issue. Whether by lack of knowledge that I should possess or by careless
observation during the progress of the disease, I have allowed a man to
die who might have been saved, or pushed into the grave one who was only
trembling with uncertainty upon its brink.
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