"3. Children under the age of eighteen shall be employed in no form of
industry whatsoever. If there are not enough hands to produce piece
goods for the Congo and the Philippines, let them draft all adult
motor-car chauffeurs, diamond polishers, wine agents, amateur coach
drivers, settlement workers, preachers of the simple life, and writers
of musical comedy.
"4. In the public schools there shall be no talks or lessons dealing
with the duties of citizenship. The time now given to that subject shall
be devoted to the reading of dime novels and fairy tales, so that on
graduating, children shall not be confronted with so startling a
contrast between the realities of life and what they have learned at
school.
"5. Cooking and other branches of domestic science shall no longer be
taught in the schools. One-half of us expect to live in family hotels
and the other half will probably be in no position to afford the
expensive ingredients employed in scientific cookery.
"6. Mr. Francis Galton, who invented Eugenics, and Messrs. Karl Pearson
and Sidney Webb, who helped to popularise it, shall be executed.
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