Whether
we marry or remain single, life is a burden to us. We go on from day
to day wondering how we may best dispose of ourselves. And nothing
ever comes of it but this miserable discontent which leaves no
possible margin for hope for the morrow. If one could only make a
virtue of the resignation which is thrust upon one by an undaunted
destiny," she concluded with a long-drawn sigh, "one might be the
better for it."
"Yes," I answered earnestly, "if one only could! I do believe that the
only sweetness in life is in being good, and those only who have never
practised virtue, doubt it. For myself, when I have devoted some time
sincerely to my religious duties I know that I feel a better, and most
certainly a happier, woman. My life has a higher aim, my ambition a
safer guide, and my efforts a more stable support, but I am not always
faithful to my good resolutions and I am easily won away from
devotional pursuits."
"Well then, Amey, you must blame yourself if you are not thoroughly
happy," Alice interrupted almost fiercely. "You have this great
advantage over me. I have no religion. I never had any. I am supposed
to belong to the Church which we occasionally frequent. I am supposed
to take a lively interest in foreign missions and the Jews. I am
supposed to sanction a doctrine which has never been explained to me;
but do I? Not I. Only for the instinctive belief which I cannot help
holding in God and a life to come, I would be no more than a very
animal; and only for a something within me--a sort of moral regulator,
which the Church calls conscience, I would never stop to question what
is right or what is not.
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