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Jerome, Jerome K. (Jerome Klapka), 1859-1927

"They and I"

And in consequence I did not hurry myself. It must have
been about twenty minutes later when I came in sight of the house.
Veronica was in the garden deep in confabulation with an awful-
looking boy, dressed in nothing but rags. His face and hands were
almost black. You never saw such an object. They both seemed very
excited. Veronica came to meet me; and with a face as serious as
mine is now, stood there and told me the most barefaced pack of lies
you ever heard. She said that a few minutes after I had gone,
robbers had come out of the wood--she talked about them as though
there had been hundreds--and had with the most awful threats demanded
to be admitted into the house. Why they had not lifted the latch and
walked in, she did not explain. It appeared this cottage was their
secret rendezvous, where all their treasure lies hidden. Veronica
would not let them in, but shouted for help: and immediately this
awful-looking boy, to whom she introduced me as 'Sir Robert'
something or another, had appeared upon the scene; and then there had
followed--well, I have not the patience to tell you the whole of the
rigmarole they had concocted. The upshot of it was that the robbers,
defeated in their attempt to get into the house, had fired a secret
mine, which had exploded in the kitchen. If I did not believe them I
could go into the kitchen and see for myself. Say what I would, that
is the story they both stuck to.


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