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Dickens, Charles

"The Battle Of Life"

I had tried to tell you of my
resolution, but you would never hear me; you would never understand
me. The time was drawing near for his return. I felt that I must
act, before the daily intercourse between us was renewed. I knew
that one great pang, undergone at that time, would save a
lengthened agony to all of us. I knew that if I went away then,
that end must follow which HAS followed, and which has made us both
so happy, Grace! I wrote to good Aunt Martha, for a refuge in her
house: I did not then tell her all, but something of my story, and
she freely promised it. While I was contesting that step with
myself, and with my love of you, and home, Mr. Warden, brought here
by an accident, became, for some time, our companion.'
'I have sometimes feared of late years, that this might have been,'
exclaimed her sister; and her countenance was ashy-pale. 'You
never loved him - and you married him in your self-sacrifice to
me!'
'He was then,' said Marion, drawing her sister closer to her, 'on
the eve of going secretly away for a long time. He wrote to me,
after leaving here; told me what his condition and prospects really
were; and offered me his hand. He told me he had seen I was not
happy in the prospect of Alfred's return. I believe he thought my
heart had no part in that contract; perhaps thought I might have
loved him once, and did not then; perhaps thought that when I tried
to seem indifferent, I tried to hide indifference - I cannot tell.


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