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Bierce, Ambrose, 1842-1914?

"Fantastic Fables"

I am in it for you, but what
is there in it for me?"
Not being prepared with an answer to the question, the Man with a
Shotgun sagaciously removed the propounder.

From the Minutes

AN Orator afflicted with atrophy of the organ of common-sense rose
in his place in the halls of legislation and pointed with pride to
his Unblotted Escutcheon. Seeing what it supposed to be the finger
of scorn pointed at it, the Unblotted Escutcheon turned black with
rage. Seeing the Unblotted Escutcheon turning black with what he
supposed to be the record of his own misdeeds showing through the
whitewash, the Orator fell dead of mortification. Seeing the
Orator fall dead of what they supposed to be atrophy of the organ
of common-sense, his colleagues resolved that whenever they should
adjourn because they were tired, it should be out of respect to the
memory of him who had so frequently made them so.

Three of a Kind

A LAWYER in whom an instinct of justice had survived the wreck of
his ignorance of law was retained for the defence of a burglar whom
the police had taken after a desperate struggle with someone not in
custody.


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