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Bierce, Ambrose, 1842-1914?

"Fantastic Fables"


"Turn about and travel the other way," said the Statesman, "and I
will keep you company as far as my home. The advantages of
travelling together are obvious."
"I cannot do that," said the Race Horse; "I am following my master
to Washington. I did not go fast enough to suit him, and he has
gone on ahead."
"Who is your master?" inquired the Statesman.
"He is the Statesman who saved his country," answered the Race
Horse.
"There appears to be some mistake," the other said. "Why did he
wish to travel so fast?"
"So as to be there in time to get the country that he saved."
"I guess he got it," said the other, and limped along, sighing.

An AErophobe

A CELEBRATED Divine having affirmed the fallibility of the Bible,
was asked why, then, he preached the religion founded upon it.
"If it is fallible," he replied, "there is the greater reason that
I explain it, lest it mislead."
"Then am I to infer," said his Questioner, "that YOU are not
fallible?"
"You are to infer that I am not pneumophagous.


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