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Bierce, Ambrose, 1842-1914?

"Fantastic Fables"


"Why do you appeal to the law?" said the Magistrate - "You who go
in for the abolition of law."
"That," replied the Anarchist, who was not without a certain
hardness of head, "that is none of your business; I am not bound to
be consistent. You sit here to do justice between me and this Dead
Cat."
"Very well," said the Magistrate, putting on the black cap and a
solemn look; "as the accused makes no defence, and is undoubtedly
guilty, I sentence her to be eaten by the public executioner; and
as that position happens to be vacant, I appoint you to it, without
bonds."
One of the most delighted spectators at the execution was the
anonymous Respector of Law who had flung the condemned.

The Honourable Member

A MEMBER of a Legislature, who had pledged himself to his
Constituents not to steal, brought home at the end of the session a
large part of the dome of the Capitol. Thereupon the Constituents
held an indignation meeting and passed a resolution of tar and
feathers.
"You are most unjust," said the Member of the Legislature.


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