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Bierce, Ambrose, 1842-1914?

"Fantastic Fables"


So he sat at the feet of one awhile, and then he sat awhile at the
feet of the other, and at last he applied his ear to the keyhole of
the casket containing the Ashes of Madame Blavatsky. When the
Inquiring Soul had completed his course of instruction he declared
himself the Ahkoond of Swat, fell into the baleful habit of
standing on his head, and swore that the mother who bore him was a
pragmatic paralogism. Wherefore he was held in high reverence, and
when the two other gentlemen were hanged for lying the Theosophists
elected him to the leadership of their Disastral Body, and after a
quiet life and an honourable death by the kick of a jackass he was
reincarnated as a Yellow Dog. As such he ate the Ashes of Madame
Blavatsky, and Theosophy was no more.

The Opossum of the Future

ONE day an Opossum who had gone to sleep hanging from the highest
branch of a tree by the tail, awoke and saw a large Snake wound
about the limb, between him and the trunk of the tree.
"If I hold on," he said to himself, "I shall be swallowed; if I let
go I shall break my neck.


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