"
Here he indulged himself in some vile language and scurrilous abuse of
religion and its ministers. All priests were hypocritical scoundrels.
If he was to be of any religion at all, he said, he should prefer
being a Roman Catholic, "because, then, you know," added he, "a
man may sin as much as he likes, and rub off as he goes, for a few
shillings. I got my commission by religion, d----n me. I found my old
admiral was a psalm-singer; so says I, 'my old boy, I'll give you
enough of that,' so I made the boatswain stuff me a hassock, and this
I carried with me every where, that I might save my trowsers, and not
hurt my knees; so then I turned to and prayed all day long, and kept
the people awake, singing psalms all night. I knelt down and prayed on
the quarter-deck, main-deck, and lower deck. I preached to the men in
the tiers, when they coiled the cables, and groaned loud and deep when
I heard an oath. The thing took--the admiral said I was the right
sort, and he made a commander out of the greatest atheist in the ship.
No sooner did I get hold of the sheepskin, than to the devil I pitched
hassock and bible."
How long he might have gone on with this farrago, it is difficult to
say; but we were getting tired of him, so we passed the bottle till he
left off narrative, and took to friendship.
"Now I say (hiccup), you Frank, you are a devilish good fellow; but
that one-eyed son of a gun, I'll try him by a court-martial, the first
time I catch him drunk; I'll hang him at the yard-arm, and you shall
be my first lieutenant and _custos-rot-torum_, d----n me.
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