"No," said I, "you would give me three dozen for not lashing
up my hammock properly." "Come with me," said another. "No," said I,
"your bell-rope is too short--you cannot reach it to order another
bottle of wine before all the officers have left your table." Another
promised me kind treatment and plenty of wine. "No," said I, "in your
ship I should be coals at Newcastle; besides, your coffee is too weak,
your steward only puts one ounce into six cups."
These hits afforded a good deal of mirth among the crowd, and even the
admiral himself honoured me with a smile. I bowed respectfully to
his lordship, who merely said--"What do you want of me, fool?" "Oh,
nothing at all, my lord," said I, "I have only a small favour to ask
of you." "What is that?" said the admiral. "Only to make me a captain,
my lord." "Oh, no," said the admiral, "we never make fools captains."
"No" said I, clapping my arms akimbo in a very impertinent manner,
"then that, I suppose, is a new regulation. How long has the order in
council been out?"
The good-humoured old chief laughed heartily at this piece of
impertinence; but the captain whose ship I had so recently quitted was
silly enough to be offended: he found me out, and went and complained
of me to my captain the next day; but my captain only laughed at him,
said he thought it an excellent joke, and invited me to dinner.
Our ship was ordered to Gibraltar, where we arrived soon after; and
a packet coming in from England, I received letters from my father,
announcing the death of my dearest mother.
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