My motive
for this is, that she may never learn the history of my death. You can
tell her that I died for my country's good, which is very true, for I
acknowledge the justice of my sentence, and own that a severe example
is wanting. It is eleven years since I was in England; I have served
faithfully the whole of that time, nor did I ever misbehave except
in this one instance. I think if our good king knew my sad story, he
would be merciful; but God's will be done! Yet, if I had a wish, it
would be that the enemy's fleet would come out, and that I might die,
as I have lived, defending my country. But, Mr Mildmay, I have one
very important question to ask you--do you believe that there is such
a thing as a future state?"
"Most surely," said I; "though we all live as if we believed there was
no such thing. But why do you doubt it?"
"Because," said the poor fellow, "when I was an officer's servant,
I was one day tending the table in the ward-room, and I heard the
commander of a sloop of war, who was dining there with his son, say
that it was all nonsense--that there was no future state, and the
Bible was a heap of lies. I have never been happy since."
I told him that I was extremely sorry that any officer should have
used such expressions at all, particularly before him; that I was
incapable of restoring his mind to its proper state; but that I should
recommend his immediately sending for the chaplain, who, I had no
doubt, would give him all the comfort he could desire.
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