Her words were all the more potent, coming as they did after the
disquieting thoughts and the feeling of dissatisfaction that had driven
him from his study that afternoon. The young minister could not at first
rid himself of the hateful suggestion that there might be much truth in
the things she had said. After all under the fine words, the platitudes
and the professions, the fact remained he _was_ earning his daily bread
by being obedient to those who hired him. He had already begun to feel
that his work was not so much to give what he could to meet the people's
need as to do what he could to supply the wants of Memorial Church, and
that his very chance to serve depended upon his satisfying these
self-constituted judges. He saw too, that these same judges, his masters,
felt the dignity of their position heavily upon them, and would not be in
the least backward about rendering their decision. They would let him
know what things pleased them and what things were not to their liking.
Their opinions and commandments would not always be in definite words,
perhaps, but they would be none the less clearly and forcibly given for
all that.
He had spoken truly when he had told Miss Farwell, as they parted, that
he had lost something. And now, as he walked the country road, he sought
earnestly to regain it; to find again his certainty of mind; to steady
his shaken confidence in the work to which he had given his life.
Dan's character was too strong, his conviction too powerful, his purpose
too genuine, for him to be easily turned from any determined line of
thought or action.
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